Aliens vs. Predator: Requiem (October 2008)

I usually write positive reviews. One of the first reviews I wrote, back in July of 2006, was for Aliens vs. Predator. I thought it was a great popcorn movie. I recently saw Aliens vs. Predator: Requiem (2008), the second movie in the Aliens vs. Predator series, and felt pretty let down. I’m writing this review in hopes that if there is ever a third movie in the series, it won’t be a lukewarm ride like Requiem. The first most obvious problem with Requeim is that none of actors in this new movie have any star quality. Sanaa Lathan was in the first entry in the series, and though not a big star, had more star power than all the actors in this second movie combined. The second problem with Requiem is that the climactic battle in this movie is between a Predator and a kind of Alien-Predator hybrid. This means that your regular run-of-the-mill Aliens are, comparatively, only minor irritations to the Predator. They’re picked off by the Predator like they were balloons in a carnival dart game.

Remember how Sigourney Weaver had so much trouble killing a single Alien in the original Alien movie? Well, she must have been a real underachiever. Apparently, according to the makers of Requiem, you should be able to kill these things about as quickly as I eat cashews. The Aliens not only die quickly in Requiem, they don’t have brains enough upon seeing another of their group split in half by a laser to do anything but continue to race toward the laser.

The lack of staying power the Aliens have in this new movie, and their ability to race toward death like my dog after a curly fry dropped from a plate, are a real shame as I’m one of the people who loved the early Alien films with Sigourney Weaver. I’m not too thrilled with the Aliens now being what the Munchkins were in the Wizard of Oz: second string characters/background decoration/etc. In fact, to continue my comparison to the Wizard of Oz, I would pretty much expect members of the Lollipop Gang to hold up against the Predator in Requiem about as long as the Aliens do. The filmmakers wind up showing a ton of respect to fans of the Predator movies by making the Predator top of the food chain, but they show next to no respect to fans of the Alien movies by making the Aliens somewhat less dangerous than a kitten-shaped piñata.

I’d have to give this movie maybe two of four stars… It’s not great by any stretch, but if I was in a coma and it was playing on television, I’d probably be thankful for the distraction from my obvious problems.

This month I’m going to end my review by interviewing one of the Aliens from
the film. (Local sci-fi movie buff Del Rivers will actually channel the character of the Alien and answer the following questions.):

Good Movies: First, I’m a big fan of the Alien movies. Somewhere along the way, either in the Aliens Vs. Predator comic books or in the Aliens Vs. Predator movies, it was decided that the Predator would be to the Aliens what the hunter is to lions. When that idea was originally presented, how did you take the idea that you would be the less dangerous of the two species?

Alien: The studio whiz kids didn’t watch the earlier Aliens to see how bad I can get. They figured any being that was hatched from an egg would be less able than a Predator with all its weaponry. As long as they keep making sequels, I’m confident we’ll win a few battles eventually. Very confident. Or I’m out.

Good Movies: In the new movie Requiem, the Aliens seem to disappear into the background somewhat as the most dangerous characters are the Predator and the Predator-Alien Hybrid. The Aliens, literally, seems to be begging for scraps left by the Alien-Predator Hybrid. Do you see this dynamic continuing in a future film?

Alien: That genetic freak, the Alien-Predator hybrid, will last about as long as hybrid cars. He’ll die off from the utter depression of not knowing which race of beings to associate with. C’mon… choose a team and go with it! The classic Alien will be back faster than classic Coke!

Good Movies: Thank you for your time and consideration.

TO THE READERS OF THE MCLS MOVIE REVIEWS: This is Richard and Del's last column. It's been a good run. Thank you for reading! If you want to keep up on what we're doing, look up our names on the web. We will both continue releasing CDs and Del is now having fun posting videos to Youtube.

Movie column:

Rich Gagnier (column writer) is a librarian, and a stand-up comic.  He was part of a four comedian show at the Downstairs Cabaret titled Alternative Underground.  Rich's set from the show can be found on the CD Misfit King.  Humorist and songwriter Del Rivers (celebrity channeler) is one of Rochester’s most unique talents. He was profiled in and was featured on the cover of Rochester’s alternative weekly City Magazine in 2002. His sketch comedy is featured on the CD Del Rivers & Chuck McCoy's Comedy CD. Adrienne Furness (editor) is the author of the MCLS monthly column For Kids and the book Helping Homeschoolers in the Library.

Contact writer through library system here.

Return to movie reviews.